Over the last week, I’ve been getting back into dating again after basically taking it easy over the last two years.
Though I have hooked up with various chicks over that time, I simply didn’t put in much energy into fucking as many chicks as I could like I did in my first year of living in Mexico.
Except for a brief period in which I tested Mexican Cupid out some odd months ago that you can read about here.
So, over the last week, I took Tinder seriously again and also began using Mexican Cupid.
Since last Friday, I’ve gotten at least 60 numbers.
I’m pretty damn good at using online apps to take in as many numbers as possible in a very quick pace.
And I’d say I’m fine at building up sexual chemistry and having a good conversation in person.
However, being honest with you, I’m absolutely terrible at texting chicks.
Or at least I think so anyway – it’s my strongest weakness.
Generally, I’m a shit ton better at conversing in real life than over text.
At any rate, I tried since yesterday to get this Mexican chick named Jovi to show up to my apartment near Copilco area in Mexico City.
She was planning on visiting me yesterday but came out with the excuse that the rain was too heavy for her to visit me.
At first, I thought it was a BS excuse…
But then I went outside an hour later to get pizza and it was fucking insane how much rain there was.
So the excuse seemed reasonable all of a sudden.
Regardless, I got her to show up today.
At 6:15 PM, she sent me a message saying she is headed towards my place.
Now, keep in mind, she came from Metro station Deportivo 18 de Marzo and I live by Copilco.
For those who don’t know, that is one hell of a distance to cover.
Literally, we live on opposite ends of Mexico City.
And this is a huge ass city.
Here’s a map of the metro station to show where she came from and where she traveled to based on the blue dots from north to south.
Anyway, she showed up at 7:16 PM.
Beginning the Night With Jovi
Once she texted me that she is here as you can see below...
I left my apartment and got to see her in a minute since I live next to the Copilco Metro station.
Inside the metro, I find her pretty easy.
Which is a relief since sometimes finding chicks at the metro station can be a major pain in the ass when they decide to troll me by hanging out at some obscure spot that I don’t notice.
Or when you choose to meet them at metro stations that are huge like Bellas Artes.
Side Tip: If you want to meet chicks at Bellas Artes, don’t meet them inside the fucking metro station. Do so in the park next to it at that statue thing they have.
Anyway, once I see her, she comes across as nice but very nervous.
We walk back outside and go straight to my apartment.
Once inside, I prepare her some tequila drink while I prepare myself some vodka and black tea mix as you can see my little liquor bar here.
Which, like with every Mexican, blows her mind because it sounds disgusting to her.
I never understood that though as a side point.
Chicks like her then went on about how water and vodka is a better mix…
But yet black tea is made with water – it just has an extra taste to it.
Regardless, I put on this reggaeton music and we get talking about whatever.
One thing that surprised me nicely was how much into reggaeton she was.
She even knew older songs like this one here and she’s only 25!
In her, I soon saw someone who could be like my friend Angie.
Shit, Angie and I even used to listen to that exact song above all the time in my first year in Mexico ironically enough.
And she is someone who is very fun to hang out with beyond sex.
Jovi seemed full of energy from the beginning, we had strong chemistry and she really seemed like the party type chick.
Which is ironic since, in the very first few seconds meeting her, my initial impression was that maybe she’s a bit conservative!
For some reason, her nervousness gave me that impression.
But once inside my apartment, that changed very quickly.
With her, I can really see someone who would be fucking amazing to go to the clubs with.
Especially in hindsight as we’ll get into later.
At any rate, once we got dancing to some of the reggaeton, things got sexual very quick.
If I had to guess, we probably started having sex about an hour once inside my apartment.
Sometime around 8:30 PM more or less.
And while I think she seemed like a chick who is down to fuck anyone and has been around a lot…
It became clear to me though that there were other motivations for why she wanted to fuck that night.
For starters, she was very obviously a gringo hunter.
One of the most obvious examples of that in my life up to this point of writing.
It was painfully obvious that, if you’re a foreigner (and not just a white one), that her pussy was yours.
She ended up showing me her Tinder profile and had literally over 4,000 men give her a like.
With Tinder Gold or Platinum (whichever it was), she was able to see who liked her profile to choose from.
And, not exaggerating, she had over 4,000 fucking people who liked it and supposedly she only had it open for the last month.
Regardless of how long she was on it, that’s still a shit ton of people.
And all of those that she didn’t like back were Mexicans.
All of the people she did give likes to or exchange numbers with?
Not just white ones.
Asian, white, black, brown, etc.
Literally just don’t be born in Mexico and you can fuck her.
Born in Ciudad Juarez? – eat shit loser.
Born in El Paso? – RAW DOG TIME.
Additionally, and the thing that got her wet the quickest, was when I told her I am involved in the porn industry.
And, as I said to her, I’m not involved in that side of the porn industry and now I just promote cam models to make a percentage of their earnings.
However, the second I told her that I am “involved in porn,” that sealed the deal for fucking.
Literally it was like pressing a button that says “open my pussy.”
This is the second time it’s happened also.
Months ago, as I wrote here, I met a Mexican chick named Karla who was really sweet.
Had a shit ton of chemistry with her also.
Similar to Jovi, mentioning the “porn thing” wasn’t necessary to close the deal.
But, similar to Jovi, there was a huge change in both of their faces when I mentioned that part about myself.
With both women, it literally was like pressing a button for sex and immediately the clothes came off without hesitation.
My impression from both of them is that, once I said that I am "involved in porn," they immediately thought I must be some gigachad at fucking.
Though my sample size is only 2 women that I have casually mentioned this to, I have a suspicion it might work on a lot more women out there.
To the point that I almost want to write in my Tinder bio “involved in porn” just to see which chicks will throw their panties through the phone screen.
Having said that, I could be full of shit – I’m sure there’s plenty of women who would find it to be a turnoff.
Plus, Tinder would ban me anyhow if I mentioned that in my bio.
Anyway, as I said, the clothes basically disintegrated the second I said that I am “involved in porn.”
3 Hour Sex Marathon
Was the sex good?
Well, her blowjob skills were absolute shit.
That actually started to piss me off during sex because of how bad her dick sucking was.
Having said that, there were good things about the sex that made it memorable.
For one, she was one of the few chicks I ever fisted in my life – she really liked that!
And fisting, though it doesn’t turn me on, is fun to do.
There’s a part of me that really like to plays it rough and she took all of the rougher treatment like a champ.
On top of that, she had an open mind to fantasies.
She asked me what “turns me on” and I told her that I fantasize about turning other men into cucks.
Basically fucking chicks who have boyfriends or husbands.
By far my biggest fantasy as I wrote about here.
So, even though she supposedly doesn’t have a boyfriend or husband, she roleplayed with it.
Mixed in with the sex toys I have…
And me fisting her over and over like 10 times…
We didn’t finish to relax until like 12 AM.
Or about 3 or so hours of fucking more or less.
By that point, I was exhausted.
Once we finished, I honestly wanted to go to bed.
But she wasn’t having that.
Hell for the Gringo Introvert
Over the next 2 hours, the fun we had started to turn into hell for me.
Over the entirety of us being together tonight, it was about 7 hours exactly.
She ultimately left about an hour ago as I write this at about 2:30 AM more or less.
As of recently, I’ve been a good boy going to bed at around 4 AM instead of 7 or 8 AM.
Trying to lead a life that has some semblance of normalcy.
Anyway, because of the 3 hour sex marathon with this chick…
And also because Jovi was a chick who was extremely full of energy like no other…
I couldn’t fucking stand it anymore.
I’m naturally an introvert.
Even though I’ve gotten pretty good at developing chemistry with strange women I’ve never met before several times a week…
And do go about it because my dick is the Army General that commands me to do so.
It's the MacArthur that commands me to blaze through Korea & China.
I can also (and have) gone days without saying hi to anybody.
And when dealing with someone for 7 hours, I just want peace and quiet for a little bit.
At any rate, I’m exhausted is what I’m trying to say.
All the energy has been pumped out of a 21 inch shaft.
And I just don’t want to hear her talk anymore.
But she’s ready man!
“Fuck yo faggot ass low energy shit MATTHEW, I’m here FOR THE FIESTA!!! CMON GRANDPA!!
She won’t fucking stop.
Wants the fun to go on.
Drunk Shenanigans of Jovi
Now, keep in mind, that over the final two hours, she really started to get drunk.
Before the sex marathon, she had just one tequila drink.
I didn’t even finish my vodka and black tea drink.
Now after the sex?
She literally went through half of my tequila bottle.
At some point, I figured it would be a safe call to force her to have water and then cut off the tequila supply.
For myself, I wasn’t drinking at all anymore except one drink mixed of coca cola and whiskey.
As I said, I wanted the fiesta to end.
But she wasn’t having it!
What did we do over the remaining two hours?
Well, I let her take charge of the music since I didn’t give a shit anymore about it.
She ended up playing a bunch of the latest reggaeton music which I don’t care for.
On that note, I can actually be pretty elitist when it comes to reggaeton – if it isn’t the old shit, I’m going to be judgemental and go “this doesn’t sound like Tego Calderon of the 2000s"
But I didn’t give a fuck what she was playing and it actually didn’t sound terrible to be fair.
On top of that, she wanted me to introduce her to the “porn world.”
So I set up an account for her with an affiliate link on Chaturbate which only took a few minutes.
So hopefully that’ll make me some money but we’ll see.
If she puts in the energy into web camming like she did with riding my dick, I guess I might make enough money to cover a meal at Chilis once a week.
Then she wanted to show me her tattoos – one of which was a tattoo of four leaves together where each leaf represents a love in her life.
Though, in her words, she only had 2 loves (boyfriends) in her life and now I am “her third.”
"Wedding Crashers" Movie scene of Jeremy confirming she is a virgin on the beach after fucking
“Tienes Muchas Chicas!”
On top of that, she would not fucking stop saying “tienes muchas chicas!!!”
Because, at some point after sex, she really wanted to see my phone and I didn’t care since we already fucked.
And she saw all of the numbers I had in my phone and all of my Tinder matches.
Now, when she was saying “tienes muchas chicas,” it was usually with a tone of voice that seemed positive.
But I’m not positive it was positive!
In hindsight, I think she took it badly.
But she didn’t burst into tears or anything.
No attitude either.
But, as I said, I started to feel some attachment from her, so I think her seeing all of the chicks I have in my phone spoiled her idea of being my girlfriend.
Regardless, I didn’t care anymore because, as I said, we already fucked.
And, as I said, I would kinda like another Angie so to speak.
A chick who is generally pretty cool to hang out with beyond just sex…
And can be a great chick to party with and fuck around afterwards also.
I definitely don’t want to lead her on into thinking that I can be her boyfriend though.
With Angie, though I didn’t lead her on, the attachment that Angie had for me initially was very strong.
It broke her heart a bit when she came to terms that I wasn’t ever going to be her boyfriend even though I told Angie many times that I didn’t want to settle down.
And we stopped talking for a while but ultimately now we are cool.
Hang out at times.
Once in a blue moon we hookup.
But mostly just hang out and enjoy each other’s company when it happens.
With Angie, the ashes had to be made first before a phoenix could rise from them.
Potential for a friendship with a chick that you can still fuck from time to time and who doesn’t see you as boyfriend potential.
With Jovi, I generally saw such great opportunity also.
She, as I saw in our final two hours after sex, can drink like a champ – up to my level!
Almost no chick can drink like I can that I have seen in life.
Plus, she’s into reggaeton viejo and knows plenty of good hits.
The sex, despite her terrible blowjob skills, actually was pretty good.
And we had a lot of chemistry beyond the sex – I genuinely liked hanging out with her.
In her though, I could not see “girlfriend material” however.
Nothing about her screamed “girlfriend material.”
If you were to make her a girlfriend, I guarantee you that her loyalty ends the second another foreigner of any race says “hello” to her in any circumstance.
Similar to how blatantly obvious she was as a gringo hunter…
She was also very blatantly the type of chick who likes to party and fuck around.
Nothing wrong with that!
But not the type of chick you would ever want to settle down with because, without any question, the hours before the wedding would involve her swallowing the sword of another foreigner.
No offense to her but that’s what I saw in her.
A very fun person (for partying, sex and also to just hang out) but not someone you’d settle down with.
Still, it was funny to see how much of a “good girl” she wanted to convince me that she was.
Because I didn’t believe her that she only fucked “5 guys” including me in life.
At first, her number was 2.
Then it went up to 4 over us shooting the shit about it.
And, when she was looking through my phone, I agreed to that only if I can spy through her phone out of curiosity.
I looked at the photos she had.
There were plenty of photos of her with other random dudes and how “they’re only friends!”
Then I came across some sex pics and some pics of her kissing some middle aged dude.
Quickly, she confessed that he was a sugar daddy from France who paid her 10,000 pesos or 500 bucks for a month one time.
So the number went up to 5 guys in her life.
For me, I didn’t have any investment into her life story – not looking for a girlfriend.
But it was funny to see her story change from 2 to 5 after she wanted to investigate how many women are in my phone.
But, as I said, she wouldn’t stop saying “tienes muchas chicas!!!” over and over again.
At some point, I told her to drop it because it was getting annoying at how often she was saying it.
Like literally drop the fucking subject – yeah I got other chicks I fuck.
Well, to be fair, I haven’t fucked any of the other ones because, as I said, I just got back into dating again.
And their numbers were from last Friday.
Jovi was the first chick I have met from this “batch” of women I got from online.
Still, despite all of that, as I said, she was such an obvious case of a gringo hunter – it literally couldn’t have been more obvious.
Like a 5.5 foot tall walking dictionary with the expat term “gringo hunter” written across it goes into your apartment and shows its vagina screaming “FUCK ME NOW GRINGO!"
And when it comes to long term relationships…
One of the problems with this type of woman is that there’s a certain weirdness when you are fetishized for being a foreigner or, in the case with other women, for your skin color.
It’s not something I’d want every day.
Having said all of that, I’d again reemphasize that she was a perfectly nice chick to hang out with beyond just the sex.
Someone I could see hanging out with for reasons not focused only on sex and drinking.
Of course, like with Angie, it’s problematic to do that.
Most women will eventually look to extract something out of you eventually if you fuck around with them long enough in my experience.
That’s a disappointing thing I find in most women – it’s rare to find a chick who is down to basically be friends who fuck on the side but hang out as well long term without her looking to get something more out of you.
That something usually being a relationship or commitment.
Of course, once in a blue moon, you do find a woman like that.
Easier with tools like Fetlife where chicks are looking more openly for sex.
Still, it is what it is.
Those are my impressions of any potential Jovi has when it comes to establishing a real friendship that happens to fuck on the side.
But let’s get back to the story.
Drained of Energy
Anyway, as I said, the night ended with all my energy drained.
And I wanted to go to bed.
Meanwhile, I have a chick who is full of endless energy, wants to fuck more, won’t stop saying “tienes muchas chicas!” like a fucking catchphrase….
And who puts my alcoholic days to shame as I have to get out of my bed several times (at least 5) to stop her from taking the bottle of tequila for more.
Meanwhile, as I said, I start getting concerned for her health and basically start forcing her to drink water.
Even offered her some of my pizza that I put in the microwave because I figured some food will fight off any heavy drunk state.
At some point during these last two hours, it started to feel like I was babysitting an alcoholic.
And dreaded the possibility of having to stay awake for another 7 hours until morning if she happens to not lose energy.
Who, at some point, also wanted to tell me about how her ex-boyfriend was an abusive prick.
Meanwhile, her English is absolute shit but, throughout the entire 7 hours we were together, she would often switch between extremely broken English and Spanish.
And I mean it literally when I say that her English is absolute garbage.
But literally – not exaggerating – it was during these two hours in which she would rotate every other sentence into the other language.
Where one sentence would be said in Spanish and literally the next one in broken English and then back into Spanish…
And I would have to tell her repeatedly to “speak in Spanish” because I could never understand what she was saying half the time.
But she persisted.
At some point, I started to ignore anything she said in English.
With her favorite phrase being “Yes, that’s OK!”
Something that she said to me throughout the entire 7 hours no matter the context even though it sometimes didn’t make sense in context.
And then the night turned into her lip syncing to new reggaeton music while staring at me.
Send Her Home?
Laying in bed with her, I’m just nodding my head to the music and thinking how to get her out of my apartment.
On one hand, I don’t want to send her home because she lives in a pretty shitty neighborhood and it’s already 2 AM.
Plus, I told her that she can stay the night.
On top of that, I’m very cheap and don’t want to spend the 7 bucks for an UBER.
Plus, my thinking is that maybe she’ll lose energy and we can go to bed finally.
Lastly, as I said, it’s become very clear to me that she’s grown a strong attachment to me over the last 7 hours.
Part of it because of the sex – not to write my own review – but she did seem quite happy with that.
But, perhaps more realistically, it had to do with being a foreigner and her fetishization of all foreigners like I said before.
And maybe the excessive alcohol intake over the last 2 hours has helped that also.
Regardless of how she ended up seemingly attached to me so strongly, I’m hesitant to kick her out also because I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
If I kick her out, maybe she’ll get sad or angry?
Especially given how drunk she has gotten.
And so I’m hoping that she burns out of energy and we can go to bed.
But that hope vanished as I said.
“Let’s Go to Bed?”
At some point, I tried to be nice and suggest we go to bed.
Instead of sending her home, I’ll stick to my promise and we can spend the night sleeping together in my bed.
And she noticed how tired I seemed….
After she was convinced that no more sex was going to happen beyond what we finished at 12 AM....
She encouraged me to go to bed by lifting the blanket up and calling me over as I was making some last minute tea.
But her idea of me sleeping wasn’t very realistic.
As she wanted to leave the lights on and keep listening to reggaeton music playing out in the open like this song here to be exact....
Which, in her exact words, is the song that "she dedicates to me."
Which is a little bit concerning because I just met her 7 hours ago and now she is dedicating songs to me.
How much longer until I hear the phrase "te amo"
And once she got out of bed to nosedive for the tequila bottle again..
In which I had to rush out of bed to stop her…
I knew that sleeping was not going to be an option with her in the apartment.
Time to be the asshole and send her home.
The Discoteca de Matt is Closed
At that point, I stop being a little bitch and decide that a 7 dollar investment into UBER is fine.
And figured the other concerns can be handled.
Surely, UBER can take her home safely at this hour despite where she lives.
We’ll get a fancier UBER ride that costs a little more money and maybe even tip the guy – that’ll surely convince him to not kidnap her and instead take her home safely.
Plus, if I use sweet language on her, maybe it’ll convince her that it’s nothing personal for why I’m sending her home.
So I tell her stuff like…
“Me encantas mucho, me encantaría verte de nuevo. Quizás podemos caminar por Bosque de Chapultepec ese fin de semana? En 2 días! Quiero verte de nuevo, SIN DUDA. Pero tengo que dormir. Te compro un viaje de UBER a tu casa y nos vemos de nuevo?”
Well, despite all the sweet talk in the beginning, it did not land the plane nicely.
In fact, the plane crashed and then the pilot got gangraped by ISIS.
Well, OK – she wasn’t that dramatic.
Her eyes did shine a light at the beginning of that paragraph…
But then the “let me buy you an UBER home” soured the mood 110%.
I was hoping I could make her feel special and not like a booty call.
In fact, I’m 50% sure that I might not see her again and she won't become another Angie.
When I told her that it’s time for the party to end, she said “OK, me voy” but had a very sour attitude.
You could feel the energy and life just absolutely sucked out of her in the second.
As if I told her that her mom died or something.
She didn’t get bitchy or yell but she definitely looked like she got sucker punched in the gut.
Almost to the point that I genuinely felt that she was going to cry!
But she didn’t.
Though it wouldn’t surprise me if she cried in the UBER ride away because she did seem upset about being sent back home.
Like I said – night and day difference.
All cherry and very positive vibes.
Her yanking my dick wanting to fuck more when I didn't want to fuck again.
Plenty of reggaeton lip synching.
And positive all around.
Spirit destroyed the second I suggested that a ride home might be a solid idea.
This Introvert Needs Silence
But I couldn’t stand it anymore – I genuinely wanted to be alone even though I liked her and we had plenty of chemistry.
Not even necessarily sleep.
Because I’m writing this now literally 2 hours after our time together ended.
As I said, I’m an introvert at nature and just want to be left alone in peace and quiet.
I need “alone time” to recharge my batteries and just chill by myself.
Leave me in peace – I fucked your brains out and I don’t want to hear about how much of a piece of shit your ex-boyfriend was.
Or how “I have so many chicas.”
Or at least go to bed.
But, like I said, going to bed wasn’t an option because she simply was not going to sleep no matter how hard I tried to get her to fall asleep.
So the UBER was what the doctor ordered.
And the UBER came.
When it was time for me to get her out of my apartment, she put up some attitude about leaving while sitting on my bed fully dressed.
Some last minute resistance to leaving.
It lasted for a minute or two, and being so drained of energy and ready for this night to be over, I felt like grabbing her and forcing her out by hand.
But I kept my cool and told her again – OK, cmon now!
And out she went.
Once downstairs, I have the security guard unlock the door and we wait for the UBER.
It took the driver a while to get to us but that was it.
Wrapping it Up
On a good note, she gave me a kiss goodbye on the lips so I guess she doesn’t completely hate me for closing the Discoteca de Matt.
And she did text me later.
Feeling like a little bit of an ass about kicking her out at 2 AM to her shit neighborhood and also seeing potential in her for being a great fuck buddy to hang out and party with...
I did make plans with her to hang out this weekend.
I’m thinking maybe a trip to El Centro sounds nice.
But we’ll see – no guarantees!
If she can get over me ending the night early then I guess we’re cool.
If not, well shit…
Whatever really – she was a fun chick to hang out with and we had strong chemistry before she went full aspiring alcoholic after sex was over.
And, as I wrap this article up, it is raining very heavily outside my patio door right now.
So thinking about how she didn’t want to see me the first day we made plans because of the rain…
I guess it was a good call to grab my balls and show her the exit when I did before the rain began now.
And, in spirit of this article, here’s a funny parody video on a “74 year old guy who ain’t ready to settle down and wants to chase tail all day.”
Hopefully that won’t be me still in 50 years!
And hopefully you enjoyed this little sex-craved adventure I had today.
As I said, I’m exhausted.
Absolutely no energy left in me.
Time for me to have a drink and maybe watch a documentary or something.