Compared to life back home, homeless people seem to add an extra annoyance to the dating life here in Latin America.
Granted, I never lived in certain cities like NYC, San Francisco, Portland, etc.
If I was comparing my life to that, perhaps I wouldn't be making this observation.
But it's wrong that I have noticed other gringos -- especially those not from big cities -- to make about life down here also.
Where homeless people seem to be more of an annoyance when it comes to your dating life than anything else.
For example, I knew another American dude who lived in Centro Historico of Mexico City and who had a bunch of sketchy as fuck homeless people basically camp right outside his apartment building or very close to it anyhow.
In short, it scared the fuck out of some of the women that would come visit him.
One of them even -- from what he told me -- showed up to the area but noticed these sketchy homeless dudes and turned around back to her place.
They literally stopped him from smashing ass that afternoon.
What exactly the homeless folks did to scare the chick away is anyone's guess.
Perhaps they catcalled her or something?
"oye mi morena bonita, ven y disfrute mi verga grande en tu culo, puta suciaaaaaa"
"AY QUE HORROR!!!" she yells.
In my personal experience, I have had similar moments.
Let's get into that.
The Bums of Insurgentes
When I lived in Roma Norte, I was close to a metro station of Mexico City called Insurgentes.
Nowadays, the area has been changed up a little bit and you got some feminist/trans person market selling random goods outside of it and the metro is seemingly a greater target to be destroyed these days by said feminists whenever they remember that their dad doesn't love them.
Anyway, back in 2017, I didn't remember too many feminists destroying that metro nor was there any feminist/trans person market selling goods outside.
Instead, you had a bunch of bums occupy a space that I would have to walk past to either get to Metro Insurgentes or take women with me back home after meeting them at Metro Insurgentes.
I often met women at the metro station to take home.
So, back in 2017, it wasn't uncommon for women to be creeped out as fuck by these random bums sitting in the street.
Just chilling by themselves usually and smoking pot or whatever.
Their simple presence would creep out the women I was bringing.
It never was much of an issue on my dating life but was one of those things every woman had to deal with when coming home with me.
"A Walk of Horror" as you could call it.
Only on a few rare occasions did the homeless people in question get a little bit aggressive in demanding money or having their sczho episodes.
But nothing too bad ever came of those moments either.
The weirdest moment I can remember as of right now was when I was returning home late at night at around 4 AM more or less (or whatever hour it was) and some random homeless person being aggressive as fuck.
At any rate, similar to my other American dude I mentioned earlier, I would have to hold the hand of these women to get them past "the Walk of Horror."
If not, they never cancelled on me specifically but it wasn't uncommon for them to show up outside my apartment but message me something like the following:
"I'm here but those homeless dudes are scary as fuck."
Thankfully, the women I date as brave as hell. Solid Mother Material.
Begging for Money
This is obviously one of the bigger issues.
What to do when the homeless people are begging for money?
First, it depends on the country you are in.
In Mexico, I find homeless people to be generally pretty chill when begging for money.
In a touristy area like Roma Norte of Mexico City, you might have more entitlement among local homeless folks who are used to foreigners giving out a lot more money than a typical local.
....Even in dollars!
Regardless, I find Mexican homeless people to be chill usually compared to other nationalities.
It's the Colombians, Venezuelans and Dominicans who are annoying as fuck.
The homeless people of those nationalities don't know how to take a no for an answer.
For example, when I lived in Barranquilla, I remember going to some popular bar spot in the city and was waiting for a chick to show up.
Some homeless dude in this Colombian city approached me asking for money.
I told him no.
He asked again and inched closer towards me.
I took my phone off the table and told him no again.
And, after each time I told him no, he tilted his head slightly more and it was like his face crunched up even more doing a full retard look while saying "pOr FaVoRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRr!!!!111!11!1!!1!1"
"Fuck off" I thought.
Eventually, "fuck off" he did (only after I got the attention of the staff to tell him to appropriately "fuck off").
In Mexico City, your typical person fucks off after the first no so it's not much of an issue.
Though it can rarely lead to moments of awkwardness.
For example, when I lived in a Mexican city called Pachuca, I was at a park with a white Mexican gal named Mar.
Some homeless dude stops in front of us asking if we'd like to buy some random object in his hand.
I told him no.
He looks at me and says "why? is it because I'm black?"
Which was weird for him to say because that was the first and the only time as of this writing in 2022 where I heard a Mexican play the race card like that in a way that would be typical of an American.
But also because the dude straight up didn't look black.
He might've been biracial though but he didn't look that black.
Anyway, nothing came of it.
We both looked at the dude like he was retarded and wondered "ok and what you want?"
And he pissed off soon after and became a joke between us.
Outside of that though, one other moment I can recall is when I was with a former Mexican girlfriend named Brenda in Centro Historico waiting in some line for an ATM machine.
Some skinny dude was asking everyone in the line for change.
He was getting no luck.
He asked me next.
I told him no.
And there was obvious tension between us because he was looking me straight in the eyes without moving on for some reason almost like he expected my gringo ass to give him money simply for being one of the only (if the only) gringo in the line.
He didn't say anything though but just look me in the eyes for half a minute or less before pissing off.
The next old lady behind me that he asked money from told him no, he gave her weird vibes too and she cussed him out "DON'T DEMAND MONEY!!" she screamed.
Dude shortly pissed off across the street.
So, in short, sometimes homeless folks down here can cause awkward moments.
My only advice is to stand your ground if you don't want to give cash, don't let them be demanding just because you are a foreigner and be VERY aware of your items.
Like if you are at a table. Make sure to take the phone or be watchful of your phone, wallet or any valuables on the table because some of them will literally try to snatch it and run or do some weird trick to distract you and take it without you noticing.
Another thing is in regards to where you and your date should sit.
If you are taking her to a bar or even a restaurant, it is understandable why you'd two would want to sit outside.
It's nicer that way!
More fresh air and all that.
I personally prefer sitting outside usually.
The problem though is that you will attract more homeless people like that unless they have a guard to tell the homeless to fuck off (not many places do have that).
And, even if they have a guard, said homeless dude could still yell at all of you sitting down if he is having a szcho moment or whip out his cheap guitar to play outside the establishment out of some hope that you'd stand up to give him cash.
So, in case you aren't ready to tell lots of homeless people no, it's preferable you sit inside (and, even then, some might try to walk in to ask for cash anyway. No guarantees a sit down inside would keep the begging away).
But is it bad to give them cash?
Giving Cash to the Homeless: Don't Overdue it?
Though I am far from a millionaire, I genuinely don't feel as much stress with money these days versus my time in Mexico a few odd years ago.
When I felt more stress, I was more protective of how much I spent and much less generous with homeless people.
With less financial stress these days, I genuinely don't give a fuck if I offer help or not.
As long as the dude isn't being a cunt where he is very demanding, I don't mind helping whatsoever.
In fact, the money to help out with is often nothing to me.
The fact is most Mexicans offer somewhere between 2 to 10 pesos (in coins) when they help out usually.
Meaning 10 to 50 cents.
And the homeless are cool with that.
So it genuinely doesn't matter to me if I help out the occasional one or not because, like I said, most are chill as long as they haven't become entitled from the gringos in touristy areas.
For example, I went on a date some weeks ago with a Mexican woman named Barbara who called herself Barbie on Tinder as I wrote about here.
As we sat down on the outside of the bar in the north of the city, we had homeless people approach us for cash.
And, like I said, it means nothing to me anyhow anymore.
None of the homeless folks were ever demanding.
Though I don't remember very well, I think I have money to like 5 or more of them that approached us?
But, like I said, each moment was only like 10 cents here or 25 cents here.
Barbara ended up noticing how "generous" I seem with all the money I was giving them.
But, to me as an American, it wasn't overly generous, was it?
Because of her several comments on how generous I am with them, I calculated in my head how much I gave that night.
And it turned out to be about a tiny bit less than a dollar.
Look, I genuinely don't give a fuck about a dollar.
Even if I gave a dollar in money to random homeless people each day, we are only talking 30 dollars a month.
Granted, to a Mexican, that is 600 pesos a month and that might be more noticeable on the budget when you earn 7000 pesos a month.
Now, to be fair, I don't think Barbara was the generous type herself.
She seemed cool and enjoyable to talk to but had a "upper class" vibe in the sense that she seemed like the type to tell the homeless to "just work harder."
No judgement to her but that's how she came across and the homeless became a minor topic for us given how many were approaching us in a short time and how I gave each one a tiny bit of change.
In the end, I think she ended up feeling guilty almost or a bit obligated to offer money also because of me.
Like women who will insist on not eating too much at a meal when other women are in the room (go for the salad) because they don't want to look bad or some shit.
When a random homeless musician dude approached us for cash after performing an unsolicited song, she jumped at it before I did to offer the dude like 20 pesos.
...or that's what she thought she offered him initially.
Half an hour later, she commented about how the money in her purse doesn't seem as much as it was before and observed that she likely gave him instead a 100 pesos instead of 20.
Or 5 bucks versus 1 dollar.
Which makes sense because the dude in question seemed quite happy after her donation.
So let me say this anyhow after saying all of that:
To some degree, I think being overly generous with the homeless hurts you dating wise than it helps.
While no bad vibes came between Barbara and I over the homeless donations on my end or hers and we ended up meeting again, I do think that being too generous can hurt.
Sure -- it's only a dollar.
To us gringos, it isn't much!
But, to a Mexican, it can give the appearance that you are overly generous if you donate and donate and donate to numerous homeless folks asking for cash even if each donation is only like 10 or 25 cents.
On one hand, you might -- perhaps like in the case of Barbara -- make her feel like she needs to help out too.
But, perhaps more importantly, I think a lot of dudes understand the importance of not coming across a "show off" in terms of wealth.
Granted, some dudes try to play the game of coming across as "Mr. Rich."
While Latinas always see us as wealthier due to being American (and especially a white one), I think it hurts more than helps to "show off" too much.
And, truth be told, I wasn't trying to show off.
It truly was just a dollar at most that I gave.
To me, that is nothing.
To the Mexican on a 7000 peso a month budget, that isn't much either but I can see how repeatedly giving money to numerous homeless folks can give a weird impression that you are overly generous (even if the total amount is literally just a dollar).
I wonder to myself if doing it like that makes her see you as a "push over" or a dude who is trying too hard to impress her with cash.
While I had no impression from her that day that she felt like I was being a push over, that thought has now come to mind as I try to think how being overly generous could be bad somehow.
But, to be fair, I did get an impression from her that she felt like I was being overly generous somehow and that I was "showing my wealth."
She made a few comments -- none of which were rude -- that made me think that she was getting that impression that I was trying to do that.
Which, as I said, is a bit funny to think about because it literally was just a dollar that I gave in total amount.
Literally just pennies per homeless person that night.
At the end of the day though, I can't blame her for maybe having that impression because we Americans and Mexicans are different.
To her making the 7000 pesos a month, the sight of a white foreigner offering cash to numerous homeless folks over one night might give that impression (especially to a woman who seemed like she wouldn't normally help the homeless anyhow).
You have to see it from her perspective.
And, truth be told, I genuinely think Americans are more generous with homeless people than Latin Americans if I was to generalize.
That isn't to say that you don't have assholes in the US who look down on them like you do in Latin America.
Only that, if I had to shoot from the hip here, I think folks in Latin America take a stronger classist look down on them than folks from home (or at least where I'm from).
Perhaps I'm wrong but that's how I see it.
Over the years here, I do see more folks looking down on homeless folks than what I saw back home and more willing to go out of their way to help strangers back home than what I see here.
So I wonder, when you are dealing with women down here, if that influences anything also when you are offering a few pennies here and there to random homeless folks.
Either way, it won't change how I behave.
I've been broke as fuck down here also and genuinely I do feel something for some of the folks I see down here and don't mind offering some minor help.
Especially since it's just pennies.
The only thing I'm saying here though is for you to be mindful of how quite possibly it's easier for a Latina to preceive you as being overly generous when you might not see it as such and how that could impact her perception of you (where she sees you as money bags more easily, perhaps a push over or whatever else).
For example, she seemed shocked in the moment at realizing that she gave that one musician 5 bucks.
To us Americans though, 5 bucks isn't shit.
But if I was offering 5 bucks to any homeless person on dates down here, I guarantee you that I'd get more "curious" looks from the women that are with me in the moment.
Still, while I'm not comfortable enough to be handing over 25 bucks a day to the homeless every single day of the month, the pennies in question (or the dollar in total) is nothing to worry about.
Anything to Add?
So is there anything else to add?
I don't know -- you tell me in the comments below.
I think that covers it in terms of issues with the homeless.
I guess you could discuss also "catcalling" but I wrote more about that here and some homeless folks do love their catcalling.
The other thing to mention is when some homeless folks do truly have their "szcho" moments and they begin screaming into the air on some episode.
Or, as I wrote about with an example here, when they get naked and begin masturbating in public.
At any rate, these are all the issues that come to mind when it comes to how homeless folks can complicate dating down here in Latin America.
It's not a big complication but something minor that comes to mind.
Anyway, thanks for reading.
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