All you need to know about Iberian America


Published October 15, 2021 in Mexico - 0 Comments

I was a young kid when a house cat would bring dead birds to the house.

I was a teenager when 3 female cats of the house got knocked up by the one male cat of the house.

I was young when one of the female cats chose not to feed her babies and let them die after she had already given birth like 3 times in her life.

And, in between those more memorable moments, there were hundreds of moments where I would interact with the cats of the house.

Growing up, we always had cats!

More than you could imagine.

Like when those 3 female cats got knocked up on the same time?

They all gave birth around the same time.

Soon enough, we had close to 20 cats or more in the house.

Most of them kittens obviously.

One of the female cats, called Girl Kitty, chose to let her babies die because she wouldn’t feed them.

And others we had to give away for free because we had so many.

One group of black kittens my dad called “the Jackson 5” because they were 5 black kittens.

For the non-Americans, the Jackson 5 was this musical group here.

Jackson 5 -- I'll Be There

And the cats being part of my life continued until I left the house.

In a way, they made me happier.

Pets have that magical way on people.

Be it cats or dogs.

With all my years in small town Iowa, I have a better ability to connect with animals.

Perhaps because of the little farm of cats we had producing one cat after another.

And I can’t overemphasize the word “farm.”

The statement that we had “close to 20 cats or more” doesn’t do it justice as to all of the cats that came into my life as a kid and teenager.

It was a bit more than that when you factor in all of them.

I could name some of them (while drunk)!

Angel kitty.

Boy cat.

Girl cat.





That orange cat we had way back as one of our first ones but whose name I forgot (the bird killer).

So on and so on!

And, being honest, pets have always made me a happier person.

Cats or dogs actually.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve felt more bonding for dogs than I did as a kid.

As a kid, the only dog I remember is the one my grandma had who barked at everything.

But, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve felt something for dogs also.

And that has been made more apparent in the last month.

Fao the New Pal!

It’s a happy and sad thing.

I moved into a new apartment in Lindavista area of Mexico City.

All these years away from Iowa has made me not think as much about my bonding with animals.

But time in Lindavista has changed that.

In the new apartment I’m in, we have a dog named Fao.

His actual name is something like Faustruck or some shit like that.

Can I be honest with you?

The owner of the dog is a nice guy but I’m pretty sure he’s severely autistic and a dipshit.

After all, who the fuck names their dog Faustruck?

The "truck" part coming from the fact that he owns a food truck.

Could you be even more retarded than that? 

Anyhow, the dude is actually pretty solidly autistic.

There’s something off about the motherfucker.

So his name for the dog is just weird.

I’ve been posting pictures of the dog on my Facebook and all the family and friends back home are like “what the fuck? Faostruck as a name? Is this dude retarded?”

He’s a nice guy!



A little bit retarded for such a dumb name, no?

I just call him Fao.

Or I call him “BUDDY!”

And the dog brings in waves of emotions to me.

In all seriousness.

On one hand, he does make me happier.

He always sleeps outside my door for at least 12 hours a day.

He follows me around the house whenever I’m at home.

When I leave the house, he barks and gets SO CRAZY when I leave.

For example, when I left the house to celebrate my birthday with a girl named Jovi as you can read here, Fao was literally banging himself against the door.

He is so god damn sad whenever I leave the house.

Always making noise.

At first, it broke my heart a little bit.

I’ve gotten used to it a little bit.

My cats were never THAT upset when I left the house.

They’d mostly just stare at me from the house window thinking “oh good, the human is finally away. Now I AM the master of this home.”

And you know what happens when I come back?

Well, back in Iowa, the cats would rub on my leg.

In this house? Fao literally attacks me.

It doesn’t matter if I was only gone for 3 minutes.


He fucking JUMPS all over me.

One time, during this month, he BODY SLAMMED the door shut.


He body slammed it shut and jumped all over me.

Going Forward

It breaks my heart a little bit.

I know I won’t be able to stay in this apartment long term.

I made a slightly bad choice picking this place.

At first, I thought it was good.

However, I realized it has water problems more consistent than I ever experienced and the heat is fucking terrible.

As I wrote my batch of articles tonight, I found myself sweating my ass off.

Whenever I go to the bathroom, I find my hair is so wet.

Also, the amount of mosquitos is fucking annoying.

I’ve thought of moving out by November 1st to November 10th to another apartment in the same area.

However, as of right now, I’m not sure if I will by then or if later.

The main thing keeping me here is the dog.

And the fact that I just moved in.

I’ve bonded with the motherfucker!

In only one month he has stolen my heart.

I want to kidnap him.


No fucking joke.

If he spoke English, I’d ask the dog if he prefers me or the owner.

Who does he want going forward?

If he said me, I’d fucking take him back to the US and leave him at my dad’s place.

It also kinda annoys me that the owner doesn’t have a second dog or cat for this dog to play with while the owner works.

How do you not have a second or third pet for the dog (or cat) to play with while you are away from home?

Imagine how fucking lonely that is for the dog.

And I've seen and heard the loneliness!

While awaking up from my sleep, I've heard the dog just making noise that screams of "where is everyone?!"

I see this little guy just all alone laying on the floor too.

And I realize that I’m his only friend from 10 am to 7 pm if I happen to be in the house during that time period.

Since I work from home, I can see him more.

Still, he needs a buddy!

I think it’s inhumane to have a pet but not have a pet buddy for the pet.

It actually kinda pisses me off that he doesn’t have a pet buddy for the pet.

And it makes me sad that I’ll possibly find a better place to live in within a certain time frame.

The house itself has a few problems that make me not like it at all.

The heat. The mosquitos. The water problems.

It’s my fault for not doing more proper investigation into the place.

Regardless, I can already hear Fao (buddy) barking one last time.

Well, I’m a bit drunk right now so it’s easy to imagine things.

But, when the day comes where I move, I can already see it.

Got all my shit together.

Put into the UBER.

And BUDDY is barking.

All upset.

Worried that I won’t come back.

When I’m his only friend during the day.

I’ll try to hold back the tears when that day comes soon enough.

I’ve planned to myself that I’ll spend the night or two after moving my shit out in the house to give BUDDY some last pets and play time.

And maybe walk out forever when the owner’s girlfriend takes him for a walk so he won't see me walking away forever.

But it’s all funny no?

How, in such short little time, a pet has hit my heart so strongly.

“You Need Pets”

Here’s a picture of BUDDY!

He was by my side today while I was eating dinner.

Chicken and rice.

When I saw this little dude sitting on the floor…

He was just looking at me while I ate.

No words.


Just loyal by my side.

Shit, this is the shit that brings tears to my eyes as I type this.

No, no…I don’t cry. I’m a man!

But man it’s going to be sad as fuck on my last day with BUDDY.

I call him BUDDY because “faostruck” is a retarded ass name.

The owner should be pushed off a bridge for that name idea.

But man it sucks MAJOR ASS BOLIVIAN DICK that I’ll be leaving him eventually.

Be it in a month or two or, if there weren’t apartment problems, a year from now.

I guess I’m more easily attached to pets than I ever knew?

My last girlfriend knew.

When we planned our move to a Mexican city called Pachuca, she told me that “we need to get some pets.”

Dogs and cats!

Though I never been so attached to a pet during our time together, I think she saw how so easily I attach to animals.

And I think it’s a good idea.

For a year or so now, I’ve thought it as necessary.

Less than a year ago, a long term cat named Count died in my dad’s house.

Sad as fuck.

And I just know that his best buddy, Claws, is all alone now.

The other cat, Dexter, ain’t bonding with Claws much.

Dexter is anti-social.

But I’ve just thought to myself over the year “you know? Shit, I could use a pet.”

A dog or a cat.

A cat sounds slightly better because I don’t have to pick up it’s shit when walking it.

And if, while walking it, I saw another dog bark and/or attack my dog…

Especially if I saw another dog attack my dog…

I’d take a knife out of my pocket and CARVE THAT LITTLE FAGGOT INTO A PUMPKIN BITCH

You don’t fuck with BUDDY!

Then I’d turn to buddy and be like “bro, you good?”

Then we keep on walking.

With a cat, no picking up shit nor slaughtering the neighbor’s aggressive dogs is necessary!

But, on the flip side, I have seen how dogs are MUCH MORE excited to see you come home.

To come home and have someone be like "FUCK YEAH, I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU."

That is a mood lifter.

And it really is much more than you realize for me.

When BUDDY runs up to me all excited, it pulls the heart strings.

"Like shit, someone really cares me about me THAT MUCH?"

For real?

It's just some cool ass shit to have someone that excited to see you.

Though, if all dogs are like BUDDY, I’d fucking hate to have to hear the little guy cry and bark every time I left for 5 minutes to get lunch.

But both are good!

Cats and dogs.

But I wouldn’t get either until I get residency in some Latin country.

Wouldn’t make sense until I do.

And much riskier.

What if I had one and, without residency, I get denied access to the country again?

What happens to BUDDY?!?!

If I had a BUDDY waiting at home and a migration officer denied me access to BUDDY.....

I'll leave this scene here to let you know how I feel. 

Dark Knight -- this city deserves a better class of criminal

You don’t fuck with BUDDY, bitch!

But, in all seriousness and jokes aside, it’s a topic.

I’ve found myself happier in the last month because of BUDDY.

Because of Fao!


Fuck off with that retarded name.

BUDDY or Fao works!

And it has lifted my spirits to have a pet.

Man, it’s going to suck dick to leave him behind.

You can’t even imagine how sad it'll be.

I love him already.

Why’d I have to pick the crappy apartment with a dog that makes me happier? 

I guess, at the very least, it made me realize something so much that I had to write an article about it here.

Something I’ve considered for the last week or so.

That being how, in the long term, I really do need some pets.

Dogs and cats.

And maybe past people were right – it would lift the spirits.

Something I miss a lot – the love of some pets.

Something to consider in the long term anyhow as I think about my life down here.

I'm 110% positive now that having a few pets would make me 110% happier.

Anyway, that’s all I got to say.

Leave a comment below here in the comment section.

And follow my Twitter here.

Enjoy this music here that I was listening to as I wrote this article.

Thanks for reading.

Best regards,


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