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No, You Can’t Wipe Your Ass with the Mexican Flag

Published October 1, 2022 in Mexico - 1 Comment

What is a good guest to another person's house?

The other day, I was visiting a friend of mine named Jose.

Jose is a Mexican.

Without even knocking, I just kick open the door like I owned the place.

Jose knew I was showing up today but I was late.

Well, in Mexico as I wrote here, that's normal among Mexicans, isn't it? Not too rude....

Then I let out a loud fart as I made my way in.

Shouted "OK so where's the tacos?"

Jose comes running down the stairs with a bunch of tacos in hand greeting me nicely: "Here you go! I hope you like them!"

I take one look at them and knock them out of Jose's hand.

"Fuck yo bitch ass tacos" I yell.

Jose, with tears in his eyes, asks softly and with fear "Mr, what is wrong with my tacos?"

"They ain't Taco Bell tacos, Jose. You fucked it up. Typical for a Mexican to not know what a real taco is" I retort.

Jose, now on his knees, begins sobbing and pleading for forgiveness: "Please Mr, forgive me!"

I then march upstairs.

Find Jose's wife and fuck her on his martial bed.

Then I kick the bitch to the side and yell at Jose "next time make sure your bitch loses 15 pounds before I show up."

"Yes sir!!!" Jose responds.

"You've wasted my time today, Jose!!!" I yell back.

Then I grab the Mexican flag hanging on the wall in the living room.

And, as the greatest offense possible, I wipe my ass with it.

Jose screams in horror: "NO, NO, NOT THE FLAG!!"

But I, as a superior foreigner, can do what the fuck I want.

This. This is how you be a good guest in another country.

The Real World French Example

While many would doubt that the story above actually happened, there are real world incidents that happen that cause massive disrespect to Mexicans.

It is, as I originally asked, a question of what it means to be "a good guest."

Of course, I don't think every foreigner is necessarily a guest.

Immigrants, in my opinion, are a little bit above "guest" status or, at the very least, are not the same level of "guest" as a tourist visiting Cancun for a week.

Still, I find it's not overly difficult to be a good guest regardless of your legal status.

Learn the local language. You are free to mention if anything bothers you but try to do so with some respect.

And, for those who don't know, wiping your ass or taking a shit with the Mexican flag is probably disrespectful.

Not what a good guest would do.

However, we have no shortage of 50 IQ brothers out there that never got the memo.

Where they are from, wiping your ass with a country's flag is common because maybe there's a toilet paper shortage.

Not in Mexico. Mexico is First World.

The most recent example that went viral quick as fuck has to do with the French students that came to Mexico.

As you can see here, one of them was taking a shit with the Mexican flag (among other issues).

"Two students of French origin who were on an exchange in Mexico at La Salle Bajío University in León were expelled and will return to their country, where a sanction awaits them.  

The young people found it funny to share offensive photos that Internet users described as “racist”, since they referred to their colleagues and inhabitants of the country, as “indigenous”.  

In another of the images that caused the most discomfort, one of the French can be seen using the Mexican flag while going to the bathroom."

Expulsan a estudiantes franceses por burlas y comentarios discriminatorios

To the surprise of nobody except our special 25 IQ brothers, they got deported pretty quickly.

While I was pretty happy that they were French and not some other American giving us a bad name, they were not the first ones to have gotten in trouble for their treatment of the Mexican flag.

Flossing Your Butt with the Mexican Flag

Next up, we have another example that you can read about here.

"No one told Miley Cyrus that it's not only rude, but literally illegal, to floss a fake plastic booty with the Mexican flag in Mexico. So when Cyrus's back up dancer used said flag on said booty on Tuesday — which was also Mexican Independence Day — it didn't go down well.  

The interior ministry is leaning towards fining the concert promoters Zignia Live for not monitoring the content of the show. In a statement, Zignia publicists argued that they couldn't interfere, but have asked Miley to be more careful from now on."

¿Qué sucederá con Miley Cyrus por usar la bandera de México?

For those interested, I went through some of the Youtube comments from what I can assume are locals reacting to the incident above. Here's a few:

First comment: "La bandera de cualquier país se respeta, y más aún estando en el, ojalá está ofensa no vuelva a suceder."

Second comment: "El respeto hacia la bandera de nuestro país es indudable, así como a las de el resto del mundo, aquí lo exigible es que la Secretaría de Relaciones Exteriores, Cancillería Nacional, Secretaría de Gobernación y Dependencias Gubernamentales  deberían aplicarle el término de persona non grata. Merecemos respeto, la bandera representa cada familia mexicana. y cada uno de nuestros hijos."

Third comment: "Voy a contextualizar un poquito: 

En USA usan su bandera hasta en los calzones, o sea, sí la aman pero expresan su amor de maneras muy diferentes, allá su bandera es algo super visible que se puede llevar en la ropa y poner en todos lados. 

Para nosotros es algo que no se toca y sólo se ve en eventos oficiales por todo el simbolismo que nosotros le pusimos en base a nuestra historia.  

Para ellos esta clase de cosas no son malas, simplemente una bandera no simboliza lo mismo que para nosotros. No es raro que hayan hecho lo que hicieron (con su bandera lo hacen muy seguido) y dudo mucho que lo hayan hecho con mala intención.  

¿Fue algo tonto? Claro. Ellos, o las personas que los asesoran, debieron saber qué hacer y qué no hacer porque llevar banderas a un concierto es muy común, y debieron haberlo pensado. Sí creo que lo justo debió ser pedir disculpas y pagar una multa. Pero también creo que es innecesario que toooodos nos enojemos por eso, simplemente no sabían lo que hacían y ya, pecaron de ignorantes, que paguen las consecuencias y sigan con sus vidas."

The last comment does have some truth to it.

You do see more people in the US more casually handling the US flag.

Though I'm not entirely confident that there wouldn't be conservative Youtubers, influences, politicians, TV personalities like Tucker Carlson or whoever else getting mad if the US flag was treated the same way by a foreigner or even another American.

As you can see here, this incident alone provoked some controversy among conservative voices concerning the James Madison flute. 

Why Did Lizzo Twerk With James Madison’s Flute?

Going back to the flag, we've always had our own controversies like what you can see here.

Penn And Teller Burning the Flag

Obviously burning it is different than twerking though.

So we might be a little more liberal and more open to discussions on how to handle it but I think there would be people mad in the US also if the same happened up there.

The other main difference -- outside of how liberal we are to the flag -- is that, as far as I am aware, we don't have a governmental body that sanctions people for mishandling it like Mexico seemingly does.

And you don't have to go as far as twerking on the Mexican flag or using it in the bathroom to draw the ire of Mexicans or the possibility of sanctions.

Let's go to some more examples that aren't widely considered as rude but still went viral briefly.

Less Controversial Examples

Going back to that one article cited here, we have some other examples provided.

"In recent years, several artists have been investigated and fined for doing much less to desecrate the flag. As La Prensa noted, actress and singer Thalia was almost fined for posing topless with the flag draped around her until she argued it happened in a different country. Another actress, Paulina Rubio, was fined 53,000 pesos ($4,000) for appearing on the cover of a Spanish magazine wearing only the flag."

Here's some videos looking deeper in those examples above for those curious.

At any rate, what does the law say about this as seemingly it is illegal?

The Law on Handling with Respect the Mexican Flag

To be fair, I'm not a legal expert in any country.

Much less Mexico as I'm not even from here.

Despite living here for years, I'm also not familiar with the laws on how to handle the Mexican flag because I never had a day where I woke up and decided to 1) wipe my ass with the flag, 2) twerk with the flag or 3) wear the flag as a piece of clothing.

Though I have taken pictures of the flag and how nice it looks in the sky!

The specific neighborhood where I am living in does seem to have more Mexican flags on buildings than other neighborhoods I've lived in Mexico City. Look at how nice that flag looks!

Anyway, what does the law say from what I could find in Google from 5 minutes of basic armchair research?

Here is one article in particular that seems to shed at least some light on the subject for us:

"According to most human rights organizations, the right to set fire to a Mexican flag is guaranteed under the Constitution as an act of free expression. However, some legal experts say flag burning is not specifically mentioned in the Constitution and can be considered an administrative offense under an article that determines "ultraje a las insignias nacionales" (insulting national insignia) to be "una perturbacion del orden publico" (breach of the peace).

"Laws dictate that citizens should always handle the Mexican flag with care and due respect. Contrary to common practice in the United States -- turning the national banner into any kind of personal apparel is considered a crass sign of disrespect. In 2008, Mexican pop singer Paulina Rubio was fined for posing nude wrapped in the flag in a photo shoot for a Mexican magazine."

So it looks like that one Youtube comment kinda hit the ball out of the park with regards to something as simple as "can you wear the flag as a piece of clothing?"

And, just a reminder again for our 50 IQ brothers, obviously wiping your ass or twerking with the Mexican flag is not allowed either.

Final Thoughts

There's a few last minute thoughts that come to mind when it comes to all of this.

First, obviously treating the flag with respect is a matter of being a good guest (regardless of how much of a guest you really are with your immigration status).

Even if you are a Mexican, obviously treating the flag badly is not recommended.

Second, these type of incidents sometimes do provoke xenophobia for obvious reasons among some Mexicans.

They see a foreigner doing something bad and blame all of us for it and/or only serves as "proof" that we're all bad.

Of course, as you can see here, there's no shortage of content online of Mexicans not always being the best guests in other countries either.

Mexican foreign minister slammed for taking 'disrespectful' selfie at Queen's funeral

And that's Mexico's foreign minister!

Not some random French students.

Among other examples we could find easily.

So no country always has the perfect guests.

Above all, the actions of a few don't represent everyone obviously.

Third, having a bit of common sense goes a long way anywhere in the world.

Obviously wiping your ass with the flag of another country and posting a video of it online while living in that country might not be the highest IQ thing to do.

Even if it's not Mexico, putting the flag anywhere near your ass from any other country will likely piss people off like you can see with Chile here.

Condena transversal a “performance sexual” con bandera chilena en actividad del Apruebo

Even those Chileans have standards.

Finally, all of this is to also highlight the fact that, compared to other countries in the world, Mexico does take the treatment of its flag more seriously and will sanction you for something like wearing the flag as a piece of clothing.

So, for those who need an instruction manual on living in Mexico, just look at the intro and try to do the opposite of everything that fictional character did:

1. Don't wipe the Mexican flag with your ass.

2. Don't kick open people's doors.

3. Don't knock food out of their hands.

4. Show up on time? Eh, as I wrote here, even so many Mexicans don't do that. That's OK.

5. Fucking his wife? Well, some Mexicans are probably into that. Who knows, right?

And, above all, don't wipe your fucking ass with the flag.

At any rate, if you have anything to add, drop a comment below.

And follow my Twitter here.

Thanks for reading.

Best regards,

Matt

1 comment

K - October 8, 2022 Reply

Literally laughed out loud! Hilarious metaphor, quality lessons.

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