About last week, I left my apartment by Copilco Metro to go to a nearby Burger King.
Now, the Burger King is probably about a 3 to 4 minute walk away from me as of right now.
It’s pretty close.
The largest obstacle to getting there is not the distance but the damn traffic.
They have it set it up where they have pedestrians wait a few minutes to cross half of the street while we wait another few minutes to wait to cross the other half.
If you have balls, you can cross the first half by doing a little jog timed between traffic just in time to cross the second half when the light is green for pedestrians.
Thereby, cutting the time to get there from 5 minutes to 3 minutes.
You see – I’m smart.
Still, I get there when I can.
And, as I walk in on a late afternoon last Monday at around 7 or 8 PM, I see a shit ton of people inside the place.
As I walk in, the hand sanitizer bottle they have by the entrance is seemingly out of hand sanitizer.
And I walk on forward.
Now, in typical Mexican fashion, it seems to be the case that people can’t decide on what a line should look like.
As there is one group of people standing in line but then another smaller group of people that are kinda in line?
But not really.
Anyway, I ignore them and go to the first formed line that leads up to the cash register.
Funny enough, some odd minutes later, some chick asks the person at the front of the line if “they are part of the line?”
And they say yes.
Though seemingly conscious that they don’t look like they are part of the line, they decide to stand behind me.
With everyone realigning themselves behind those two chicks behind me now.
Even the Mexicans get confused sometimes as the line forming behavior of their own locals.
I do all the time!
It does seem that, based on my time here, that Mexicans are shit at forming lines.
Mostly because, at times, you got folks who seem to be forming their alternative lines but don’t enforce them?
And then, like these two chicks, they realize that their alternative line has no authority and then they get behind someone who is in the real line.
With everyone behind them following suit.
Honestly, is it that hard for some folks to know how to form a line?
I’ve caught myself in that moment a few times in Mexico in which I’m thinking to myself “am I part of the real line?”
Happened to me a month before that even when I went to Little Ceasers.
It was raining heavily outside and I stand behind some lady who was not actually in the line.
Some locals behind me also in the moment believing that I knew where the line was.
In which, at some point, I realized the bitch in front of me was not in the line and I was bamboozled!
Bamboozled, I tell you!
So I joined the real line accordingly.
Thankfully, in Burger King, I was actually part of the real line this time.
Not bamboozled this time, I tell you!
Anyway, as I am waiting my turn in line, I notice that they are having issues in which the machines behind the counter are not working.
And the employees had to write our orders and the price on blank receipts they printed out.
Before it was my turn, I took the time to observe who was in the Burger King.
In the moment, I didn’t see a single obvious foreigner – you know, one who was either Asian, very black looking or someone with blonde hair and blue eyes.
Nobody whose physical appearance screamed “FOREIGNER, FOREIGNER.”
No English words to be heard for miles.
All of the people in the place (dozens of them at the time) were all seemingly speaking Spanish and blended in with the locals as being Mexicans.
I was seemingly the only American in the place.
Nonetheless, I eventually got to the front of the line and made my order.
Got my food quicker than expected despite how busy they were…
And walked back home to enjoy my food with black tea prepared.
Now I can already hear the complaints….
“But Matt, why eat Burger King in Mexico?!?! WHAT A WASTE!!! EAT TACOS, PENDEJO!!!
Shut the fuck up.
I’ve already talked about this perspective before in other articles but I figured I might as well make a separate article for it.
You have folks who basically think that living in a foreign country has to mean that you always, in every meal, enjoy the local food.
So if you are in Mexico, then you must ALWAYS eat Mexican food.
If you are in Italy, then you must ALWAYS eat Italian food.
If you are in China, then you must ALWAYS eat Chinese food.
If you are in Bolivia, then you must ALWAYS eat Bolivian food.
God – with the last one, why not just send me to Guantanamo Bay already?
Still, the idea is that one must IMMERSE oneself into the local culture ALWAYS when abroad.
Personally, I find this to be retarded.
First off, some countries have shit food.
That isn’t to say that you can’t find good food in some of their local cuisine like in Bolivia or Colombia.
Though, in my few months eating Bolivian food everyday in Cochabamba, I failed to find a single thing to enjoy in their cuisine.
It was all, literally speaking, dogshit.
But I’m sure there must be at least one food item that the Bolivians do well outside of potatoes.
Their potatoes were actually quite nice.
Still, if the local cuisine is shit in wherever you are, then I don’t blame you for going for international cuisine when you have given the local cuisine a chance.
Second, there is a huge ass difference between being a tourist and a person who lives here.
If I was only going to be in Mexico for a week, then I’d agree that it would be dumb to try Burger King.
You should try the local food if you are only there for a limited time!
Though, to be fair, I don’t always follow that rule either.
I try to though.
However, when I was in Poland years ago, I looked at the menus in local restaurants and thought that the food described sounded disgusting as fuck.
So I opted for a Subway sandwich and other chain restaurants familiar to my homeland.
Now, to be fair, I sure did miss out on a fun experience trying Polish food!
However, being honest, I don’t give a fuck.
I read the menus at different restaurants offering “traditional Polish food” one time in Warsaw and thought it sounded disgusting as fuck.
So if the food sounds disgusting, I don’t blame you for avoiding it.
Though, in a broader sense, I do encourage people to try the local food if they are a tourist here for a week.
However, if they live here?
Then shut up.
Look, I’ve tried Mexican food more than most of you reading this.
I know Mexican food than most of my readers (outside of those who have lived in Mexico also or are from Mexico).
I don’t need to try Mexican food for every meal.
The purpose to trying the new food that is “real” when you are a tourist is because you won’t have a chance to for a while when you go back home.
I haven’t been home in a long ass time.
I live here.
With 4 years in Mexico, I feel alright with Mexican food.
Not the king of what Mexican food is but I get it.
Also, I know some might counter with "but Mexican food is so diverse! There's an endless amount of things you can try in your years there!"
But if you got years here, you don't need to feel pressure to eat Mexican food for every meal still.
You can explore the options that exist down here while still having some Burger King or whatever that is not Mexican food once in a while.
And you know what?
Mexicans agree with me!
Third, Mexicans agree with me!
When I went to this Burger King that day…
Or that Little Ceasers….
Or really, whenever I go to a chain American place, I tell you that it is literally 99% full of Mexicans.
I can’t remember the last time I saw another foreigner in a Burger King, a McDonalds, Wendys, Dominos, etc., down here.
Outside of these dudes here, I guess.
It’s ALWAYS full of Mexicans!
Never another American.
Not saying other Americans don’t eat there…
But I ain’t never seen them there!
So even the Mexicans get tired of Mexican food!
From what I have seen with MY OWN EYES!
They get tired also of it!
Like me, they also want to break away from Mexican food once in a while to try something different.
Same thing when I was living in the US – sometimes I’d get tired of American food and would want to try something different…
Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Peruvian, etc…
You do want something different every once in a while!
So do the Mexicans!
So if the Mexicans can enjoy Burger King that day, so can I!
Fourth, eating at Burger King supports the homeland!
After all, as far as I am aware, it’s an American company.
Same with McDonalds, Subway and many others.
So when I support these companies, I’m supporting American companies.
Putting money into their business.
Which, in theory, somehow makes my country greater?
I have no idea if it does – I doubt it.
But it makes me feel like I am somehow patriotic by supporting the businesses of my homeland.
So obviously I got to support them once in a while, no?
Suck this red, white and blue COCK!
Fifth, I do sometimes miss a good meal of chicken and fries.
Which is what I ordered at Burger King that day.
However, Burger King doesn’t hit it as nicely but does alright.
But there are restaurants from my hometown that serve chicken and fries quite nicely.
Now, I don’t live in Mexico because of “the good food.”
I think that’s retarded.
But I do miss it sometimes like anyone would miss aspects of their home when living far away.
So, when I can get some chicken and fries, I’m happy with it.
Even though, as I said, there’s a way of doing it in some restaurants back home, that I miss quite a bit.
Sixth, some people might counter with "but Burger King isn't healthy!!!!!11!1!11!"
Eh, fuck off.
Neither is sticking your dick raw in 50 different woman but I ain't complaining about that either.
Look, let me give you the usual "we're all going to die anyway" argument.
Plus, I'm not arguing to eat Burger King or McDonalds for every single meal for a month like this dude in this documentary here.
But once in a while if you enjoy the food?
Sure -- knock yourself out.
And that’s all.
Above all, the main point really here is to not feel judged for “going for Burger King” or “Subway” when living abroad.
If you are a tourist abroad for a week, then I get the criticism.
But if you live abroad, honestly, you fucking miss food from home sometimes.
Deep down, I’ll never not be an American and will always miss, to a degree, some of the stuff I had back home.
That includes, at times, the food also.
And so while I enjoy Mexican food, just like the Mexicans, I’m not going to have Mexican food for literally every meal.
So that’s all.
Follow my Twitter here.
Thanks for reading.