Escape the Dehumanizing Cars of America!

I remember back when I was a teenager first learning how to drive….

The very first time was when I was at some park in my hometown with my dad learning to drive his truck.

Because of the gravel beneath us and how I was driving it…

I accidentally spun the truck around in a chaotic way that almost hit the vehicle of some family sitting down having food in front of us.

After that?

I was in some driving program that we had to take.

And on the first day where we were allowed to drive with the instructor, I decided to take us onto some highway.

Anyway, we weren’t on it for too long…

The instructor told me to take the exit and get into the downtown area of the town.

So I did….

But wasn’t paying attention for some dumbass reason.

And almost drove the vehicle straight into a wall.

The kid in the backseat looked horrified.

The instructor reached his hands over, grabbed the wheel and slowed the vehicle down.

Suffice to say, I was one hell of a good driver.

Though, in all seriousness, I was.

I did a lot of stupid shit sometimes but only hit someone’s vehicle once.

That happened when I was backing out into the street late at night and accidentally gave a little tap to the vehicle of the neighbor across the street.

So, all around, I could’ve been worse.

Did I like driving?

Hell yeah!

It was fun being in a vehicle going fast down the highway with some music like this here playing…

Or this here playing…

Something that fit well.

Drive fast.

Window down.

Maybe have a nice ol’ American gal sitting next to you giving you a blowjob while you hitting 60.

The sunset in the distance.

That’s dope brooooo

The Gringos Who Hate Driving

Granted, not every gringo enjoys driving.

Some odd months ago, I was in some Telegram group for foreigners living or visiting Latin America.

And there was this other American guy who had the same name as me – Matt.

Who was living in Northern Mexico.

Anyway, he definitely had his reasons for living in Mexico which is cool.

Some of them weirder than others or arguably exaggerated stuff.

But one of those reasons from what I remember was how he doesn’t have to drive down here!

That you can just walk anywhere in Mexico without needing a vehicle or take a bus somewhere.

Which, to be fair, that’s all true.

In many ways, that is a benefit overall.

And it’s not just him that says that…

Over my few odd years down here, I’ve met the occasional gringo like that who lists “not having to drive” as one of the main reasons for why they like life in Latin America.

Funny enough, they’re almost always American or Canadian.

I’ve never met a European say this but, to be fair, I believe European cities tend to be more walkable anyhow.

So that might have something to do with it…

Still, while I also sometimes list the “not having to drive” as a benefit to life down here….

And it is a benefit for sure.

There are aspects to driving that I miss also.

For me, it was never a motivation for why I traveled or started living down here.

And, to this day, it basically serves as a very minor benefit to mention when giving the laundry list of benefits you see with living down here.

Anyhow, let’s break down some of my thoughts on the matter and wrap this article up since it’s not a very complicated topic obviously.

Vehicle Expenses

This is the first obvious point.

In which you are saving money obviously by not having a vehicle.

No gas.

No car insurance.

And no costs associated with maintaining your vehicle.

Sure, you save a bit.

It’s been years since I’ve had a vehicle so I have no idea what it would cost.

About 9 years almost actually.

So, if I had to guess, maybe it saves you 300 bucks on average per month?

Not counting the cost of a car loan if you have one.

The only vehicle I ever had was a 97 red chevy truck so no car loan with it.

It was reliable.

Never needed any fixing up when I had it for some few odd years.

And so sure – you do save money by not having it.

Though, to be fair, I don’t think the savings matter that much if you can afford them.

When you do spend the money, you at least have the extra freedom to get around more easily.

Freedom & Safety

I started off by talking about the savings you’ll have.

But that obviously comes at a cost to you somehow.

In this case, not having your own vehicle.

Not everyone thinks like the other Matt or other foreigners and go “well, finally I am free from having to drive around!”

In fact, people see it as the opposite.

Now you are not so free in that you need to use public transportation to get around.

Seen this video here?

That ain’t too uncommon now – people hijacking buses.

Granted, I’ve been on plenty of buses down here and never had that.

Or maybe you take a combi in a city and someone pulls out a gun like here.

That happens a lot in some places like Estado de Mexico!

Not to mention the extra risk of having your shit stolen like seen here.

On the other hand, it should be noted that you can get fucked over by driving your own vehicle obviously.

Like in this video here of some folks having to pay a bribe to the cartel.

Though, being fair, I can't remember this being too big of an issue in the US....

And regardless of the danger that can, once in a blue moon, come from public transportation versus driving around…

Obviously, you can get around more easily.

Like when I was living by Cuatro Caminos of Mexico City…

It’d take me maybe 40 minutes to an hour to get to some of the spots I prefer for nightlife.

Though, on one particular night, a guy I know drove me over to a spot like that around Reforma Avenue and we had a great time.

Got there in like 15 minutes maybe?

Or some shit like that.

Not having to sweat my balls off in the public transportation system that smells like piss.

Being jerked around.

Having a homeless person drugged out sitting across from me looking at me like he’s possessed by Satan.

And people begging those in the train to buy their shit.

Forget all that.

Can just easily show up and done in less time and less hassle if you got your own vehicle obviously.

Something that some foreigners seem to forget when they talk about the benefit of being able to walk around.

And one of the reasons why they might forget so easily….

No Family

They don’t have kids!

Neither do I.

Though I imagine that having a vehicle would be a lot more beneficial if I had kids.

And whoever you settle down with might think so also…

My last girlfriend was like that.

She asked me one time if I ever thought about getting a vehicle in Mexico.

She sure seemed interested in getting one for herself one day.

First, not every Latino down here sees not having a car as “being free from having to drive.”

Many see it as a status symbol like in other parts of the world.

It’s not impressive to her if you don’t have a car obviously.

Try explaining your 500 dollar budget a month expat logic to her – “but amoooor, we have the FREEDOM of being able to use PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION and WALKING!”

Her response – “no mameeees, mi esposo es un maricon sin dinero”

And i imagine that line of reasoning would work less with her if you actually have kids.

Sure, plenty of local chicks might be down for a life without a car since it is easier to get around walking.

But still…

You know that won’t fly with every chick, especially if you have kids with her.

Thrill

As I wrote in the introduction to this article above…

One thing I miss about the US is having my own vehicle to drive around fast with music playing and all that

It’s fun!

Sure, it costs money.

But a lot of things that are fun cost money from time to time.

Suck it up.

Don’t got the money to enjoy driving fast with a girl to the side giving you a blowjob simultaneously?

Well, sucks to be you!

This lucky guy in this video here gets it...

Can't really do that when you have to take the public bus with la abuelita sitting next to you and a skinny ass dude trying to sell you chocolate for 5 pesos standing in front of you....

I, on the other hand, miss it.

If I was planning on getting residency sooner, it’s one of those things I’d contemplate seriously on getting.

Commute Nightmares

To be fair, I think some of the folks who have an autistic kneejerk reaction to driving again likely suffer from some weird form of PTSD that stems from commuting to work.

I can’t relate.

I did drive to some jobs I had like working at Subway or this hospital and other shit…

But, in a small town, that’s like a 20 minute drive at most.

Not much traffic really.

Big deal.

But if you have been commuting terrible drives to work for hours on end each day….

Yeah, I get why you’d have such a positive reaction to not having to drive again.

The only part of this I relate to is having to deal with other idiots on the road.

Back when I was driving around, I remember pissing off this one guy and he followed me around for like 20 minutes…

I just kept on driving to random parts of town until he decided to fuck off.

So, to be fair, that is one negative of driving – potential road rage and all.

Watch this interesting video here of this guy going nuts.

So that is a benefit that I suppose you don’t have to deal with…

Though, on the other hand, you still have to deal with “Foot Rage.”

Foot Rage?

Where you can walk anywhere you want in Latin America in a place like Mexico or Colombia…

And you learn that most of the locals walk like fucking turtles, block you and randomly stop in front of you with no self-awareness while checking their phone.

Then all you can think about is going full Pat Bateman on them!

HEY MEXICANO!!

A Bullshit Excuse?

Finally, let’s address one last thing…

Which is that I suspect that, for some of these gringos, listing the “not having to drive” is a cover up bullshit excuse for why some of them are really here.

Especially if their reason is basically something that revolves around pussy.

Either trying to get a trad wife or trying to fuck as many chicks as possible.

To which maybe they feel insecure about saying that is their main reason…

Though they’ll always remind you about how “WESTERN WOMEN ARE TERRIBLE! THE WEST IS DEAD!”

There was that Matt guy who was talking about his satisfaction from not having to drive…

And, in his words, he wrote some sentences that sounded way too dramatic like “driving made me feel like a COG IN A MACHINE!!! It was DEHUMANIZING and DEMORALIZING!!!!”

Literally some shit like that.

No exaggeration.

And all I could think was “damn, that’d make for an awesome death metal song.”

Something like this song here….

Let me do the lyrics for you….

I WAS TRAPPED IN A CAR!!!!!

TURNED INTO A COG IN A MACHINE!!!

DEHUMANZIING

DEMORALIZING

MY HUMANITY WAS DEAD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOD IS DEAD

MY FAMILY IS DEAD!!!!

MY WIFE WAS KIDNAPPED BY SOMALI PIRATES!!!!

NOW WE HAVE TO DRIVE CARS

LIFE COULDN’T BE WORSE!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

You see?

I’d make a good career out of being the lead singer or lyric writer for a Death Metal band.

I got talent.

Anyway, in all seriousness, it’s shit like that which makes you think “OK, stop being overdramatic. You don’t give that many fucks about driving, do you?”

So, for some of these individuals, I believe it’s a more socially acceptable excuse for living down here in Latin America.

Are all expats who talk about having to drive using it as an excuse?

Not at all!

But some don’t feel very genuine about it.

Final Thoughts

Anyway, that’s all I got to say.

Enjoy this video here of this guy who manages to escape the police in the US in some cool ass car.

When you give up driving for a life in Latin America…

Just remember – you’re giving up the opportunity to stick it to the man and escape the authorities!

And how cool would that be?

NOT RECOMMENDING YOU BREAK THE LAW, I’M JUST SAYING

Anyway, leave any comments below.

Follow my Twitter here.

Thanks for reading.

Best regards,

Matt